Get To Work

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Still a bit ho-hum about this new job but I cannot wait to start earning money again! Have so many things I need to get and really need to start saving up- I hate not having a rainy day fund. I’m also in a kind of “unemployed routine” that’s all very well on a temporary basis but I need to snap out of it before its too late.

I’m meant to be starting on Tuesday and my philosophy with the job now is just to go in with an open mind, do my best but keep looking for something else in my field with a bit more money (cos the money in this one is pants-pretty insulting really but more than the dole) and one that doesn’t involve working Saturdays. That may sound fickle and a bit “beggers can’t be choosers but it’s time to stop worrying what other people think and do what’s right for me.

I’m the type of person who’s always been really loyal to where I’ve worked- I worked in one place for 5 years and my last job I was there for 2 1/2 years and would have still been there now I’m sure if it wasn’t for the way the business was affected by the economy. It sucks that the company is gone now as such because it was such a great place to work, now more of my friends have lost their jobs in the last couple of weeks so I hope things work out for them as well.

Wherever I’ve worked I’ve always made friends, I know its not important for everyone to get along with their workmates and believe me there’s been a few along the line who I never want to see again but its nice to have someone to have a laugh and a chat (and a bitch) with. So who’s to say this new place won’t be any different. We’ll just have to wait and see.

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Quick Catch Up.

Been a bit lax with the blog lately so apologies. Well, had my birthday- 28 now. I had a lovely day and a great night out on Saturday with some newer but really good mates. Well I say night out, we started at 2pm and I rolled home at 3am. I was remarkably not hungover on Sunday (which when you think of it is slightly worrying)

I got some lovely presents, my Dad picked out a fab necklace for me (which I would have picked myself so that was ace) and the usual Dad present- money. My brother got me a Wii- which I wasn’t expecting at all, we dont normally go for big presents for birthdays but I was a thank you for a few other bits as well. Thanks P.

My friends must reckon I pong as I got plenty of perfume- I have quite the collection now, I need to get through them before they go off. I dont have one signature scent- I like to vary and with the collection I have now I could have a different smell for every occassion. I must take a picture when I think of it. Apart from that I’m still keeping up with the Couch to 5K programme at the gym, I’m on week 4 now so far so good. I also got My Fitness Coach for the Wii and it rocks. My diet went on the backburner what with my birthday and it was my Dads this week so I couldn’t not eat the cake (that would have been rude!!) but I’m back on track now.

I’m expecting to get a call about the new job next week regarding starting dates etc. Im still looking for something else but, yeah it will tide me over for now. I actually came across a job on recruit Ireland today that looked perfect and belonged to an agency that I’m registered with but when I rang them about it they were clueless, I’m going to try again tomorrow, I dont want to let it pass me by without even going for it.

I’ve a few other bits to tell you but my computer is on a bit of go slow tonight so I’ll have to leave it at that for now.

Running Away With The Circus (I wish!)

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So an update on the concert. It was absolutely ace! Even if you weren’t a fan it was such a great show and unlike Britney every song was sung live! Regarding the show- I don’t like the circus, in fact I hate clowns (really) but these were different clowns, hence the pic. If I could go again right now I’d be gone like a shot.

This was the second time I’d seen them, the last time in Manchester was great but this was a different experience altogether. They played all the old classics, including a rain sequence for Back for Good. They mixed in tracks from The Circus album which I’d already downloaded so I could sing along. The atmosphere was wonderful- the audience was 95% screaming women so we fitted right in. The best song was of course Never Forget which without sounding like a sap made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. My favourite, Howard was also looking great very easy on the eye…..

The Script were also great, I kind of liked them before but now I am a confirmed fan and have been listening to them non-stop the last few days. I even let out a little squeal when I saw them on BNTM on Monday.

The only slight bummers were that the sun was so strong at the start of the night that even though I had suncream on I ended up with a slight farmer tan (fetching!)and also when we left the stadium we asked a Guard for directions and he sent us totally the wrong way, thank God we were able to flag down a cab to get us back to the hotel-otherwise we’d still be walking.

I went with my friend C and her two work friends which was fine, I get on with these girls and we had a great time. The only thing that irritated me was that they talked pretty much non-stop about work and people they worked with. Ah hello-remember me???

One of C’s other friends was staying at the same hotel but we were separated at the concert. I don’t dislike this girl but we just don’t click, I find it very hard to have a conversation with her. It’s been like this ever since we were in school and I can’t see it improving. I just think you can’t be friends with everyone, I’m polite to her when I see her but I’m glad I don’t have to mix with her all the time.

Anyway we headed back early on Sunday- there was no point in hanging around as we weren’t shopping or anything. I was home in Costa by about 1:30 and flopped for the rest of the day.

There are some pictures on my Flickr link so feel free to have a look. I’ll try and post some more but it just takes so flipping long!

Come Dine With Me.

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I have to admit at the moment I’m obsessed with watching Come Dine With Me. I’ve watched so much of it over the weekend I now have square eyes. There are some great cooks on it and I’ve definitely picked up some recipe ideas. But we all know the point of these programmes is to laugh at the people who think they can cook but really couldn’t boil water or the obnoxious knobs who make you want to hurl something at your TV. The commentator Dave Lamb is fantastic though and seems to say exactly what you’re thinking about the contestants. One guy last night didn’t seem to understand the difference between constructive criticism and being a tosser who was just playing up for the cameras. And he came in joint first- wtf??

I don’t think I’m a bad cook- I’ve gotten a lot more into it over the last few months. Originally I was going to be a Home Economics teacher actually but my life went a different route. I cook a lot for my family and myself. I love experimenting with different flavors- you don’t know unless you try do you? Food you cook yourself is always so much nicer than anything ready made or a take away. I’m trying to set up a dinner party with my friends at the moment but it impossible trying to get everyone together on the same night between babies, jobs and so on. I do make quite a good curry so if they want to sample that they’d better get their asses in gear.

The Morning After

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So the party? Well it was a lot better than I though it would be. C drove- she said she wasn’t bothered about drinking so that was cool with me.

S had text me before to ask me to pick up a few supplies so I staggered into C’s car laden down with Coke (the beverage!), OJ, Tonic and my own stuff. When we got there I knew a few people, I didn’t know a few more. There weren’t a lot of intros but I think that was an oversight. When S has a party she gets very caught up in making sure there’s plenty of drinks, food and so on, not a bad way to be but it’s her party she should be out there having fun not feeding the 5000!

Anyway C and I got chatting to some other girls, one I had met before, we talked about politics (how grown up) and discovered we had been part of the same running group as one all be it at different times. Incidentally I forgot until last night that the group was run by a priest known as Galloping Jesus- that really makes me laugh now, I’m still smiling typing this.

I’m glad we met those girls though, it gave us someone to talk to. I’m sure the others there were nice- we did speak to them but some other girls there were both pissed and IMO quite stand offish and rude. Of course then I thought to myself were they rude cos they knew about the row- did they have some sort of opinion of me? Now in the cold light of day I think so what? and what’s more do I care?

Anyway S liked her presents and saw the card. At one point she called me aside to tell me some family stuff that had happened, it kind of made me sad cos before I would have known about that straight away but anyway everything seemed ok. Before we left  I could see C getting itchy feet for about half an hour, I would have maybe liked to stay a bit longer. Anyway I said to S I meant what I said on her card we both said we had had  a lot of stuff going on, we hugged, had a quick chat and you know what? It felt ok. She’s off on holidays today but we’re going to have dinner and drinks when she comes back.

I know it’s a friendship, not a marriage but I think it’s worth fighting for. It’s gonna take effort on both parts (not just mine) but we’ll get there I think.

On a side note I had approx. 3 V&T’s as well as two shots which for me isn’t a massive amount but this morning I felt ROUGH. I’d kill for some Diet Coke and Toast- actually any carbs this morning but I really don’t want to break my low carb idiot proof diet. I’d also love to plunge myself into the pool and come out feeling refreshed but I cannot be arsed driving out there. I think I’m just going to have to settle for a cool shower and some eggs. It ain’t the same.

Parties With Friends

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Tonight I’m going to a party. Fun, yes? Well to be honest I’m not sure

If you’d have asked me last year- well make that two years ago about the host, S, I would have said she’d was my best friend. Not my oldest friend, that would be C or F but this was the person I felt I could be myself around more than anyone. We had plenty of drunken nights out, weekends away, phone calls and texts with running commentary while watching Corrie or Eastenders.

Then almost two years ago my Mum passed away. That night S was away in Capital City for work and I rang and rang to talk to her but she didn’t have her phone with her. Not her fault I know and eventually I got hold of her. I knew logically she couldn’t come back I’m not that silly but I wanted my friend. She also couldn’t come to the funeral because of work which really hurt, its still does to be honest but some things can’t be controlled. When she came to see me a few days later it was like she didn’t know what to say, she didn’t sympathise with my Dad and I felt didn’t handle things well- unlike my other friends who in my opinion were really there when I needed them.

I told her all this and we talked about it and I thought moved on. But now I don’t think I did. When it was coming up to the one year anniversary I thought to myself “I’ll wait and see does she say anything” It was like I was testing her. I will admit to being a bit immature and snappy- in my defense I was having a hard time. This wasn’t helped by a friend of hers having moved over here and me feeling a bit left out- I know, I know childish.

On the day of the anniversary I heard nothing- everyone else text me, I had cards from people in work, got taken out to lunch but it looked like S had failed my test. I didn’t text her cos in my mind- why the hell should I?. My birthday rolled around a few days later (tough timing huh?) and again no text. However that afternoon I received a lovely bunch of flowers from her. I realised I was being silly and text her to say thanks and…. nothing back. I tried again later… nothing. The next day I got a text back but got the distinct impression that S was also annoyed with me. But I was the injured party right?

Rather than talking about it I sent an email outlining how I felt about things, we had a bit of a to-do and I thought the air had been cleared. Then we didn’t talk for 5 months. How did that happen? You know- I’m still not sure. It was stubbornness, not communicating properly and a lot of other things. I was dealing with a lot of stuff and couldn’t process it.

What I will say at this point is this is one side of the story, if you spoke to S you may hear a different version, this is my take on things, I’m not saying I’m totally in the right.

Anyway, in November I cracked, I text I emailed and then we spoke on the phone. I took a lot of responsibility (maybe too much) and we met up. Things were a bit awkward but I thought we were back on an even keel. We exchanged xmas presents. The texts and calls were a bit less, we were busy, S had some new friends but we were friends.

Anyway since Christmas I think we’ve seen each other once, we text, IM or call each other the odd time. Sometimes it feels like old times, sometimes it doesn’t. Now tonight we have this party. Its her birthday party and on her card I told her I will alway be her friend and I hope we can get back what we had. That may sound clingy but I’m going to be honest I miss my friend, I miss my old life. Maybe we’ve gone too far and can’t get back the friendship we had. Maybe I deserve better. I have had a bad attitude to a lot of things, that attitude has been somewhat readjusted in the last while. We’ll just have to see what happens

So I’m off to the party tonight, I have a new dress, a present and a bottle. C is coming along with me. There will be people there I don’t know. I’m nervous, part of me doesn’t want to go but go I will and if this friendship had bitten the dust I’ll live but I hope it doesn’t come to that.